If you have read the latest issue of Business Standard, they have kindly provided a copy of “The Billionaire Club”. If you have read further on, you would have noticed that Azim Premji as the No.1 Billionaire in India. If you have stopped there, fine. That was the intention anyway. But for my more discretionary readers, you might have read the Fine Print. It clearly say this,
“Due to the incompatibility of our computer to process large numbers, we have not included the name of Gaurav. However, we assure that he is the No. 1 Billionaire of India.”
Most of you would not have read this because it requires an electron microscope to magnify.
Psst! Let me let you on to a secret. I purposely asked them to eliminate my name. No, I don’t grow poppy. I don’t even smuggle bombs. I stopped enriching Uranium 6 years ago. But I am scared of those weird Income Tax people who would come rushing home if I had them include my name in the list. Hence, the fine print. Now, now, don’t go around telling this to everybody! Don’t you dare think that just because I am on my way to become a Chartered Accountant, I have immunity from those chaps there.
Now, on to more important stuff.
I got a call from “Retirement Benefits From ICICI yesterday”. I told them I am already happily retired from public life.
Exams start on 24th, so I have absolutely nothing to do till the 23rd. That’s got me to learn to waste away my time more productively doing quite a lot of things. For instance, today I watched the Shark Tale twice in a row. Otherwise, I am just sulking on my couch playing some damn stupid game[ cant play GTA, it uses the F-word a bit too much, precisely, after every damn word spoken.] . Still otherwise, I am chauffeuring people around, especially relatives’ kids asking for a precise metallic brown coloured balloon with a Donald Duck on it standing with Pikachu. You can’t explain stuff to kids; especially that Pikachu and Donald were not made by the same company and hence can’t be together. But do they understand, NO!
So, I told them that Pikachu missed his/her/it’s flight to Disneyland and thus couldn’t pose with Donald. They were satisfied. Got them a stupid pink balloon with a heart on it.
Also, that loser of a person Amar doesn’t seem to have any inclination to give a birthday treat. Wait till I get Gaurav Kothari to come to his house in a gypsy and bash him up with Hockey Sticks. You just wait! That way, I would also be eliminating competition for the exams coming up.
Ha! HA! I am becoming nastier, and loving all of it.